My family is quite a mixed bag of weights, and it's probably fair to say that I could easily have grown up with a weight problem and I am thankful I have lead a pretty blessed life as far as myweight is concerned. Most of what I remember about my childhood was very active since we had a pool and I played sports in every season. I never thought twice about my weight or size throughout my childhood. My parents were extremely loving and taught me that those things didn't determine who you are anyways - so I was lucky to grow up knowing that true beauty and personality was more than skin deep and that was just what was true to me. It was in that mindset that I went through high school hardly ever giving a single thought to my weight or my shape. I ate when I was hungry and I only bought new clothes when I felt like I wanted something new. I was extremely lucky to go through that time in my life without the worries and self-image issues that I know many many girls struggled with in those years.
College wasn't much different, I didn't live a dorm so I never experienced the buffet style cafeterias and I always pretty much had at least one job in the food service industry which is where most of my nutrition in those years came from. I went to parties and drank and enjoyed life having what I wanted when I wanted it even if that included a bi-weekly trip to TacoBell. People would mention I was lucky to eat like I did and stay looking the way I did - but I never gave those comments any real thought. I didn't gain a freshmen 15 but I did gain the young professional 15. I was working, I had money and now I was eating out alot more, eating more frequently, drinking more frequently. I was fairly upset when I stepped on the scale one day and realized how much weight I had gained. After a few conversations with a close friend I decided to cut drinking regular soda out and swap to diet. I was also in a gym class at the community college so I was working 3 times a week and between that and the very large amount of calories that I'd cut by saying goodbye to regular soda I was able to drop weight really quickly. I was really happy too, I didn't 'diet' I ate still what I liked and I was pretty content.
Fast forward some years to the present - I'm in my late twenties, and I now realize why so many people told me how lucky I was in those years to stay as thin as I did. Other than maybe the more frequent eating out or whatnot my diet and eating choices haven't dramatically changed in the last few years, but my body has. All that weight I'd lost I have gained back plus some. I now an very self conscious of my body and weight and it's really become an issue I deal with all the time. Growing older has set me into some different routines for better or worse. Some are good in that I eat more frequently, but some are bad because I am so set in my ways of eating frequently that I often eat when I'm not as hungry. And like it or not I can't eat the way I might have been able to eat in the past. This is one of the hardest things for me to come to terms with. I can no longer eat like one of the guys and stay skinny. I have to change my eating habits and eat for how I am now. I know that if I don't make changes to my diet and exercising routines I will not only not get smaller I will likely continue on the upward climb that my weight has taken. I know many may look at me and disagree that I need to lose weight but for me weight lose is as much for my looks as it is for my mind. I know I need to make adjustments and those adjustments are alot about self-control and coming to terms with the fact that I can't just do whatever I want, whenever I want to do it. Also I just know if I can't find the time to make the better healthier lifestyle choices now before I have kids then I might be doomed since life certainly isn't going to be slowing down for me.
I know I am a beautiful person inside and out still - my momma taught me well. But as hard as it is for me to come to terms with I know I’ve gotten older and now am going to have to make different choices if I want to continue to be happy with my body and my self image. This is something I've been struggling with alot over the past year and it was something I felt I'd finally decided to do something about just about a week ago when I started to use weight watchers as a diet guide again and get into the gym no less than 4 times a week. Then this dietbet popped up for me this past weekend and it seemed like a really good push to start off right. They say it takes 28 days (i think) to form a habit and I'm guessing that this is maybe part of the brilliance of this type of challenge - and I'm noping for it to be a kick in the pants for me to get started.
I am excited to see where this challenge takes me, I hope it starts me off on a good path and serves as a useful tool to get me to the end goal line. Cheers to changes and coming to terms with our bodies and minds :)