In a couple days, I'll start my 9th dietbet. It's been a few months since the last one, and I don't always win but I always "win", if you know what I mean. I lose a few pounds in a slow, healthy way and that is a huge accomplishment for me. ;)
AS I think about this next DB, and start paying more attention to my eating and start thinking about meal planning and food shopping, it shines a bright light on my eating habits. It makes me realize how I use food and eating for lots of things in addition to providing nutrition/sustainance and the simple pleasure of a good meal. I use it to relax, to occupy myself, or to keep me company. It's a companion when I am happy and want to celebrate or congratulate myself, and it's a companion when I am lonely or sad or want to unwwind from the work day.
It's hard for me to "stop the party" so to speak when I am eating. It's hard for me to have a serving of food, enjoy it and then be done with it and move on. I am never judgmental of people who are addicted to alcohol or other drugs. Food is my drug. I know what it feels like to be so attracted to and ruled by a substance.
I'm trying to reckon with my habits. At least now I am aware of it after some years of growing into adulthood and self-reflection and putting some time in the therapy chair.
Lately I can see how eating is a response to stress. Sometimes the stress stimulus can be very small (an email at work that I don't like), and now I'll catch myself reaching for a hershey kiss or some crackers to soothe the feeling of stress.
And now I will sign off and will go wash my face and get ready for bed. I've had dinner and there is no need for any dessert or snacking. Party is over. ;)