Well, I attempted to blog everyday for 4 weeks. I did not quite make it. I did have a really great month though! I really think that having this obligation kept me more accountable regarding my workouts and my clean eating than normal. I missed a few days and I had to take a few more rest days than are scheduled in the official P90X3 program, but I always came back and kept moving forward. I have three more workouts for the second month of P90X3 and then onto month 3. I can't wait to see the results after that since I already have great things to show for month 2:

I won my kickstarter! I'm at a weight I haven't seen in a year! Woohoo!

I lost about an inch around my waist, hips and each thigh! (It's bizarrely hard for me to measure myself, but that means that this year I've lost about 3 inches around my waist total!)

I don't think my arms have ever been so buff. Ever. I mean, they don't look completely fabulous because I still have a little layer of squishy, but I can see more definition than ever before, and boy can I feel the muscle! I keep challenging my boyfriend to arm wrestling matches because I'm convinced I'm buff now. I lose, of course, but I think I make him work for it a bit! Haha I'm REALLY happy with the progress I see on my arms.

And my back! My back looks so much better. I'm glad. I've had back problems since early high school so any time I KNOW I'm getting my back stronger I feel good. 

Perhaps more important than arm wrestlting, I feel that I'm in charge of myself now. It's kind of an odd thing to say, but honestly for the four years leading up to 2015 I felt completely out of control. I've said a lot of this in blogs before, but since it's the end of my month of blogging I'm feeling introspective. Since the end of 2010 I exclusively ended up in jobs that I absolutely hated, I went through a crappy break up in 2011, I lived in horrible, horrible apartments. It all just seemed beyond me and that no matter how hard I worked whenever I moved or got a new job it all was still so bad! I was struggling so hard to stay afloat there was no energy left for anything else. The only happiness I ever found was in food and alcohol. So, now, nearly 4 years since I feel like my life fell apart I can finally say that I feel like I'm in control of myself again. My boyfriend has done A LOT to help me feel better. I now love my home with him and feel secure money-wise. He encouraged me to finally get out of the horrible job/school situation so I could breathe! He even encouraged me to breakoff a family tie that was so very toxic to me. I wouldn't have been brave enough to do that on my own. I'm really lucky he is here. 

I've been on dietbet since I left the evil school and it has been so helpful too. It did take me a LOT longer to feel in control than I thought it would. I kind of hoped that I would immediately feel free and happy and lose the depression weight and life would be all sunshine and roses. I thought I would be at goal weight last month! Well, it took closer to 7 months just to get to where I feel whole, and happy. I still have a ways to go to reach my ultimate goal weight, but I'm halfway there and I can see changes. It feels so good. I'm so glad I didn't give up. I hope that those of you out there struggling don't give up either. I haven't had such a list of achievements as I do today in all the months I've been on here. It's mostly been a slow, halting process with small fits and bursts of success accenting what was generally lots of frustation. Life must always be teaching me patience, I guess. It never seems to go on the time scale I set, but sometimes that's not such a bad thing. 

Here's to the next 28 days. :-)