When I feel overwhelmed, I start doing math. Dividing numbers into percentages. Using my calculator app to trick my brain into feeling better is a fairly harmless quirk. Yes, my "day job" involves a lot of statistics, too. I calculated that my weight loss journey is 81% complete. It feels never-ending, it really does. But knowing I'm more than 3/4 of the way there is really, really, really comforting.

As of this morning, I was 188 pounds at 5'8''. That's 25 lbs from a BMI of 24, or a weight that is considered healthy by Clinicians. It's also 104 pounds LESS than my highest-ever weight.

For the first time in history, reaching that golden weight where I'm not considered overweight seems like a possibility. Let's start at the beginning.

Before I Lost 104 Pounds

In early September 2014, I weighed 104 lbs more than I did this morning. At 292 pounds, I was inching frighteningly close to 300. I was honestly shocked that I'd gotten that big, and yes, I literally had every excuse in the book about why I'd avoided scales. This was the product of mental gymnastics, I tell you.

Jasmine's Mental Excuses for Her Weight:

  • I'm a vegetarian, I eat healthy, I can't be really gaining weight can I?
  • I'm super muscular, I did sports in college, so that adds pounds.
  • I'm large-framed according to wrist measurements and body composition analyses, so that adds pounds. 
  • I have PCOS, so my body may be a little bigger "naturally." 
  • I have a toddler, a full-time job, and I'm in grad school full-time and do some freelance work. I don't have any time.

All of these have SOME truth in them. But let me tell you, the scale and the fact I was suddenly at real risk of getting diabetes at 25 was the only truth I needed to focus on. I buried those excuses. 

To be fair, it's not like I'd never put in effort while I was piling weight on at ages 23-25. I'd start diets--nutritarian, vegan attempts, low-carb attempts, dukan diet attempts, paleo attempts--lose up to 20 lbs and then abandon them and gain the weight back quickly. I remember crying on my kitchen floor on the dukan diet because I was craving bell peppers and couldn't have them. Irrationally, I was convinced I was getting scurvy because my body was demanding Vitamin C. Spoiler: not a medical professional, but I'm pretty sure you can't get scurvy in a few days and crash diets are crappy. 

Anyway. I get it. I don't know ANYONE overweight or obese who got that way because they ate McDonald's 3 meals a day. Most people's weight gain journey looks a lot like mine--a overly busy schedule, too many dinners at restaurants on business trips, failed dieting attempts, and some underlying health conditions.

What I Did to Lose the First 80 Pounds

I started eating a moderate low-carb diet and drinking more water. I didn't exercise. Yes, I reintroduced meat for complicated reasons I still feel ethically conflicted about (my underlying hormone conditions mean I may not tolerate soy especially well). I ate three meals a day, and consumed some very-low-carb chocolate protein bars when I wanted something sweet. The first month, I lost over 20 lbs. 

I lost weight very quickly, and plateaud HARD at 210 pounds in February 2015. And honestly? I felt great there. I'm 212 pounds in my glasses and beanie progress picture on the right. Yup, I'm clinically obese in that "after" picture. However, I felt fantastic. I was lifting a lot of weights, wore a size 11/13, and ended up getting married to a gorgeous musician after a whirlwind romance. I was really happy there and maintained very easily for about 8 or 9 months as we moved cross-country and bought a house.

I then proceeded to gain 12 pounds and get pregnant. After having a perfect baby boy in September 2016, I decided I really wanted to tackle getting to a healthy weight again. For real.

Getting my Sealegs Back

This is probably not shocking, but I gained weight during my pregnancy. We had some high-risk scares that were blessedly false, but I spent several months in Summer 2016 on a--not even joking here--high-calorie, high-fat diet, and bed rest. Not super condusive to minimal pregnancy weight gain, was it?

The first time I weighed myself after having my son, I was 239. Ouch. 15 of that came off quickly, and then I started to struggle. HARD. Ever heard of someone who ISN'T losing weight on a 1600-1800 calorie-a-day ketogenic diet? That would be me, in December 2016. 

The Final Stretch, FOR REAL

I don't think it's fair to say that the last 20-30 pounds really is the hardest. Because weight loss is JUST hard, and I've never failed as many times as I did trying to get started. So, let's agree weight loss is hard, and maybe some of us can also agree that losing the last 20-30 basically requires a biochemistry degree. 

I'm joking, but there's lots of adjustment. There's a lot MORE effort for fewer results in terms of pounds lost. There's scientific studies that indicate massive weight loss lowers your body's basal metabolic rate, or BMR (Google the biggest loser study). Having PCOS can lower your body's metabolism by 200-700 calories, too. 

I'm hoping ASAP to actually get my BMR tested, but from what my LoseIt logs are telling me, I think my metabolism is 400-500 pounds lower than it "should be" for weight, height, and age. But I'm still plowing throw at a normal, healthy rate of 2.5 pounds per week averaged over the last 10 weeks because I'm carefully tracking and constantly making adjustments. 

I'm doing it! I've done it. I've lost 21 pounds since the I weighed in for my first DietBet on January 5th. And I'm now addicted to the accountability this community gives me.

What I've Learned

To get the scale to move, I've learned how important water is. If I don't hit my water goals, the scale doesn't budge very well. I've learned how important multi-vitamins and electrolytes are, especially as I get more and more active. I've learned that bodyweight workouts are a great substitute for a gym, and that protein is literally everything.

I'll be using the Dietbet blog feature to chronicle the last leg of my journey, and what I'm learning along the way. As I conclude one DietBet and begin two more, I'm looking to connect with people in ALL stages of their journeys to share lessons and encouragement. Let's do it!