Today I've decided to start. Yeah, I already started two weeks ago when the dietbet began and I've already lost 4.1kg (5.1%) just by working out a bit and eating healthy, but today I faced my weight. Today, I had to tell someone my weight for the first time in years and it was hard, too hard.

I told a friend. She is going to help me achieve my goal weight and has to keep track of my changes. I knew she wouldn't judge me, she is one of the sweetest persons I know, but I delayed the moment for a week and today I couldn't delay it anymore.

Not even my mother has an idea of what the number is when I step on a scale, and she hasn't known for years. So, here I was today panicking over telling someone and trusting them with a secret that has driven me to very dark places before.

I am not going to say I feel relieved or prepared, but I did it and now it's over. It is not my secret anymore. 

She is going to check up on me in 3 days and I'll have to send her my weight again, but this time it will be easier. I'm really eager to show her I've improved and I'm getting fitter and healthier.

I started this dietbet for myself, I wanted to get healthier, but lately it was getting harder. Even if I already achieved this month's goal I just wanted to go back to my comfort food. However, now I also have the support of a friend and I'm not alone. I don't want to let her down, and although I know I'm supposed to do this for myself, I think its a good start to begin relying on someone else until I can rely on myself.