In December 2014, weighing a stunning 117 kilograms, I downloaded a DVD from a trainer called T.Horton.
He was a typically American guy, and the programme he was doing was named "P90X"..I think it was the Chest, shoulder & triceps DVD.
In those days I liked weightlifting.
Doing 3 x 10 reps with 120 kilograms on the bench was just normal. Bicep training with 30's dumbells..I loved it.
But I just had lost all the will to eat right and I was so tired every time afterwards, so I had done nothing for about 2 months.
Working, then go upstairs (we have made a fitness room in our house with all kinds of stuff in it) and do my power training.
At least I did something..right?
No warming up, and what is a cooling down?
Just throw the weights away after half an hour and go under the shower.
But it wasn't fun anymore...not showing off to all those kids who used all kinds of crap because they wanted to lift heavy as well..
I was alone, at home...and of course, I could choose my own music...the bench was always free..and I didn't have to drive to the gym for half an hour, in any weather conditions because we had it all at home..

The change came after playing that DVD.
This guy, Tony, was a real fun guy to listen to and his comments where accurate..
I loved that crew behind him, with all those different persons and I saw also that they where incredibly fit.
I got curious and wanted to see more of this dude.
I bought a copy of P90X from someone for €35,00 on a second-hand buyers site.(there was no possible way to get it via a Dutch website or purchase it in the States)
I could download the worksheets and schedule from a site called "Beachbody", so that was great.
I put in the introduction DVD and heard The Man talking..
I was sold.
My wife, who is an excellent cook and very positive in attitude, made a food schedule that fitted exactly with every work-out we had to do for 90 days.
So when we had to work with weights, she would cook a heavier meal (potatoes, a lot of veggies and a lot of lean meat) and when we had to do cardio or yoga she would make something else, like spaghetti or a light rice and veggie mix with lean turkey or chicken of very skinned mincemeat. (we have an excellent butcher in our neighbourhood, we're just lucky I guess)
We got more and more into it.
And after a month, when I weighed in...it was unbelievable..
I lost 5 kilograms, lost centimetres around my waste, belly and legs/arms.
Even my neck lost centimetres.
Also, I did Yoga...which was....well...awkward..
I never stretched before, and I thought this was never gonna work for me.
I was so tense in my whole body, and I could not touch my feet with my fingers when I bend over.
And I sucked in it.
in fact, I sucked in a lot of exercises.
The first week, I remember that I could not last the entire training.
After 28 minutes I was just exhausted..but I kept on trying.
"Do your best and forget the rest" is what The Man was saying to me, all the time.
So I just had to do it.
My slogan also was:"Bring....it!!"
And my weight loss and the overall better feeling was supporting me as well.
I got more fanatic by the day.
I didn't long for chocolate, chips, fries, sausages, beer and all that stuff.
I just want to do more push-ups, more pull-ups, higher jumps, better yoga poses..
In three months I lost 17 kilograms...I was in a high.
My heart rate dropped from 74 in rest to a staggering 45 bpm.
It was a success..
We started on January 1st 2015..and kept on doing this until November 2016...

In the meanwhile, we had "other things" on our mind.
We married in 2014 and we tried having children since 2011..
That failed..after 1,5 year of trying, we went to the doctor and he could not explain to us why it wouldn't work.
So then we started "the hospital-route", which meant IUI 6 times in a row.
No result.
Then IVF 3 times in a row.
No result.
Going abroad to a better clinic, with our own money invested.
No result.
It was devastating...
In October 2015, when the IVF abroad failed, our world kind of collapsed for a few weeks.
We had to think of another way to form a family.
We had to think about adoption.
After a few weeks, it was clear to both of us: we would do this!
Two years later, after doing a mandatory course, a few very fierce investigations by Child Protection and finally getting the approval for adoption, we applied for a baby from the United States.
When I think of this process, and all kinds of other situations that occurred during these years, it is a small wonder we could keep going on with work-outs and healthy eating.
But at a certain day in November 2016 I was just tired.
Tired of working out and tired of all life issues we had, I just could not go on.
(We did P90X three times in a row, Classic 2x and Lean 1x, then we did P90X3 a few times, and finally 21DayFixExtreme)
"After December..." I mumbled to my wife when she asked what programme we should pick up, and start again...
 January 1st, 2017, we would do P90X2..we just needed another programme.
I did buy 22HardCorpse, but I longed for weights, Yoga and jumping around while getting my core into shape..
So we started that..it went very well for about 3 weeks..and then I had my scooter accident.
I could not walk, I could not sit, I could not lay down...my back was totally ruined..I felt like a 90-year-old man.
Of course, I kept on working like a madman, never called in a day sick, and the stress was getting at an unhealthy big place in my body.
Oh..and I kept on working day in, day out for years... especially when I was doing the P90X because that gave me a lot of energy.
But as from the end of January, I did not do any work-outs anymore.
Oh yes, we tried one.."The Masters Hammer&Chisel" in August 2017..and that was fun..until I got really sick in September and crashed totally...
All the years of miserable failures, stress and anxiety came out.
I was at home for 5 weeks, and I had to work half days for almost 2 months..
In December 2017 there was great news that we were matched.
Finally!!
A baby!
We would become parents!
Just a few days before the delivery due date was passed, we got the terrible news that it would not go on.
And we had to suck in the bad news and go on with our lives.
We hope we get matched again, in the next few months..(but it also could take years before we get chosen by a birth mother)
But in the meanwhile...what do we have to do?
Another setback?
Is this really our life? Do we deserve this?
I am so disappointed...and then I got this mail..from DietBet.
Tony Horton again.
I forwarded the mail to my wife...
"Shall we do this? Maybe it gets us back on the right track concerning doing work-outs and eat healthier.."
And here we are...
Waiting parents, who pick up again where they left.

And yes..we choose P90X Classic again.
Of course, I gained a lot of weight again.
My heart rate is 73 bpm in rest..I weigh 112 kilograms.
I did not measure my waste and belly, or anything else...but I will do this again.
And I am going to BRING IT....
So, this is the first blog..and I hope you understand a little bit what we have endured the last years.
I know I can do it.
I did it before, right?
I just have to start again..putting in that first DVD again. (I purchased a brand new P90X DVD set on the website, the official way, shame it isn't on Blu-ray)
I just have to say:  Do your best....and forget the rest.
Grtz. Olaf