I am not sure what has kept me from continuing on my journey to health and wellness, and more specifically my weight loss. But- I am sitting here weighing in again in the 200's and Im thinking to myself... If only.
There are so many "If only's" that run through my mind. If only I worked harder. If only I didnt let that breakup get me down. If only I didnt move in with my mom. If only I had more will power. If only my back hadn't of gotten injured.
If only.
But when I sit here and I think of all of these things, I realize that those really are all just excuses. I've lost weight before. At one point I was at 70 lbs lost. And I plan to be there again, and past that. But what I mean is, I know how this works. I know how to do it. And I know how to work around a lot of different circumstances. I didnt lose all of this weight in ideal conditions where I could just focus solely on losing weight and healthy habits. No- I did it in the real world. Where temptations are around every corner, and where people ridicule you for wanting to eat healthier. Its a strange and hard world out there, and thats where I accomplished my weight loss.
Now I may be sitting at 200lbs but I am still at 50 lbs lost. And that is something to celebrate. Something I need to work on is the extra 20 I have put on. In part I do believe a lot of it is bloating due to my back injury, and therefore will go away as soon as the inflamation in my back decides to go away as well.
But some of it is just because I was stressed, and I ate. And I have no one to blame for that but myself. And thats ok. And I will live. I never thought I would be one of those people that gains weight again, but here I am. But at least I have stopped myself now, instead of putting on the other 50 lbs too.
I joined this dietbet this time because 1. I had the money that I felt I could spare to do it. and 2. It is always motiviating. I've only ever lost one dietbet. And I dont plant to make it a trend. 4% of my weight-- 8 lbs and 27 days to do it. Its go time. But most importantly, its time for me to make time for myself. Being a full time employee, full time student, and someone who works in a couple different ministries at church, my time is pretty precious. But I plan on doing some work on me during these winter months, and continuing into fall. I figure if I lose 4% of my weight every month (doing a dietbet every month) then in 10 months time, I will be at my goal weight. Now- hopefully I will lose more than that every time, I'm truly hoping that I lose closer to 6%-8% this time since I am starting out pretty fresh. But the 4% will be what I am 100% willing to accept!
This year is a time for me to just get it done. I do not plan on being the same person next year as I am this year. I want to change not only physically but mentally and emotionally as well.
Here's to the next 27 days!