So, I did my first weigh-in, and I feel kind of nervous. I don't know about what, but there is something with being held accountable for my actions.
I have been sick, and immediately fell into my first trap, which in my family goes by the name The Auby Trap.
Have you ever played the computer game The Sims? Me and my daughter have been heavy players for more than a decade, and about 8 years ago we convinced my husband to play. For those of you who don't play, it is a game where you create characters, build houses for them, make them interact with each other and make them find ways of supporting themselves. This is a lot like playing with dolls, with one big exception: if you don't take care of their needs, there will be consequences. Real ones. If you don't let them pee when they need to, they will not only pee in their pants, they will also be embarrassed about it.
Anywho, my husband created this character, Auby, a nice young woman with modest needs and wishes for herself. But, due to my husband's inattentiveness, she "suddenly" was very VERY hungry. It was in the middle of the night, and she had stayed up WAY pass her bed time. She was, due to her being up too late, also very tired. So my husband ordered her to go to bed. But since she was so hungry, she couldn't fall asleep. So he tried to decide that she would cook. Very well, she got out of her bed and started to cook, but she also started to cry because she was so tired, and couldn't finish making a meal for herself.
This loop of trying to sleep - trying to cook - crying - eventually came to a very sad ending: Auby died. We still not know if it was starving, depression or simply exhaustion that killed her, all we know is suddenly the Grim Reaper came, and all that was left was an urn next to Auby's bed.
We don't want that to happen to us. We want to keep a great part of our weight. Yes? What does this mean? you think to yourselves, reading this in order to make some sense. I will tell you: We need to have a plan for ALL the various situations when we are close to finding ourselves in an Auby situation. That means: what would we eat when we are sick? I fell ill for three days, all alone at home. With a big jar of Nutella. Yes I ate it. I had nothing else that required a minimum of energy to make for myself, and I did not have the energy to go to the store.
So I will come up with a crisis plan for myself when it comes to food I can eat when I am sick, or when something unexpected happens. Because unexpected things happen all the time. And I don't intend to end up like Auby.