Well I am back again with a new outlook on losing weight. I had really hard issues last year around November and gained all the weith back plus 10lbs. I allowed my x to get into my head. I had lost almost 15lbs on diet bet won my first game was excited and moving forward on my second when.. The X-Factor got into my head and said "You may be losing weight and looking good but your face will always look old"... After this I spiraled down a bad path and felt like my wings had been cut off. Throughout our relationship he was verbally abusive and mentally abusive. I feel ashamed to let him back into my head after trying so hard to move on with my life. But those words just cut into me like nothing else.
I did respond back and that did not make me feel any better just worse because of what I said and what I have been turned into when I am around him. It was a constant fight or flight relationship with this man and a very toxic relationship. Because of all the stress in this relationship I now have a heart condition called Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrom. We have two kids and we were together for 10 years.
I am now putting back the peices that I stupidly allowed him to break with that one comment. I came to realize a year and a half ago when I dumped him that it was not a good relationship,now I have to move forward 10 years older with two small children.
I am picking myself up again and have a plan, I started a wellness program that my cardiologist suggested, which includes acupuncture, healthier diet, stress therapist to help with my inner child and co-dependancy (not sure what that means but I am in), DietBet, focusing on my kids and nurturing myself. I am going to block him out and move forward with my life. Stress free, abuse free and hopeful of reaching my goal weight one step at a time.
Much luck to everyone in this journey!!