Three days in a row seeing the scale go up, back to almost my starting weight, I have lots of thoughts running through my head:

--I should just quit now; there's only 2 weeks left in my DB4, no WAY I can win that money.

--They say you have a 14-day refund guarantee; maybe I should quit my DB10 too...after all, I PRE-paid the entire 6 months, so if I quit now, I can get that money back.

NO. No, no, no, no. I refuse to quit. I am learning about myself, and seeing patterns in my eating that I have needed and wanted to change for a long time! Every day is opportunity to transform how I approach my food and my life.

I know what I need to do. I have a simple and realistic food plan. I have TONS of exercises I love, and I have all the equipment, DVDs, books, and space I need to do those exercises.

There is a great saying by Hillel the Elder:

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And if not NOW, when?"

Seriously, WHO is gonna do this for me? WHO is going to bring me longer life, fewer risks of obesity related diseases, lower body fat percentage, greater strength and energy, freedom from overeating, new confidence and joy? No one is going to do it for me: it is an inside job. Not an EASY job. But it is up to me.

And WHEN? I am halfway through my 30th year...turning 31 in April 2015. I have been saying that 30 is the year I am gonna "turn it all around". Do I really want to be making the same resolution at 40, 50, and beyond? I don't want to get to a point where "the damage is done"...I don't want diabetes, joint pain, or to become so stuck in my eating habits that change becomes impossible.

I am not quitting. It's not even about the money, it's about being able to look myself in the mirror and know that I am giving my best effort.

To be realistic, I may not hit my goal for my DB4 (only two weeks left), but I am sure gonna TRY!

And I still have my DB10...monthly pots, the big pot at the end. I am already prepaid and all-in...and I've got lots of time to reach my goals in that DB! And I am taking on the challenge!