I have to laugh when I look at my weight loss graph.  

It is such a lie!

I never report the ups (unless I'm starting a new DB), and I sometimes spread my losses over several days to make it look like I am losing consistently.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who does this!

My real graph would look like a jagged line with lots of peaks, valleys and a BUNCH of plateaus.

Two weeks ago I hit an all time low weight of 146 lbs.  I was so excited that I started messaging people, and I'm pretty sure I danced a little jig.

Since then, my weight has done nothing but go UP!  For absolutely no reason at all.  I've been eating well and exercising my butt off - well, not literally, cause that would be like the most awesome thing ever!

But the point is that I've been doing everything right and the scales make it look like I am doing everything wrong!

The scales LIE I tell you!  Lie!!

Which is why I create a lovely graph line to more accurately reflect what the scales would say if it wasn't such a bold-faced liar!

I'm pretty sure the reason for my weight gain has something to do with the fact that I am 47 years old and going through perimenopause.

perimenopause
   noun
   the period of a woman's life shortly before the occurance of menopause during which she experiences - at random times and for varying lengths - PMS FROM HELL!

I am expecting - any day now - to wake up, stand on the scales (after I pee and strip nekid, of course) and hear "I am so sorry for lying to you Mendy!  Your actual weight is 145 lbs!  Please forgive me!"

Of course I'd probably completely freak out because my scales don't talk.

But, they do LIE!