Ok, on an up-note. At the end of my self-sabotage, I realize that I am feeling stronger. My core -- always strong for me -- is feeling and looking more defined. My glutes and thighs feel stronger and my clothes are a little looser. I'm doing several arm and body strength training exercises that I never had the confidence to even try -- and I'm getting better at them. Not just marginally but obviously. On a very good note, I'm dressing and carrying myself more self-aware and confidently.
Yay, me!
I can do this and I deserve to do this for me!