Why am I my own worst enemy? Why am I so self destructive? What makes me give up so easily when I fall off the wagon? I think I really need to try to answer these questions and adjust my attitude if I am going to be sucessful long term.

Attitude is so important. So is science. I am a biologist/chemist. I should be able to reason with myself with science. It takes a 3500 calorie deficit to lose a pound. It also takes a 3500 calorie surplus to gain a pound.  Since that is the case why, oh why, do I want to give up after a few bad days? Is it because of the extra water weight that also typically retained with the dirty/cheat eating? Maybe. Is it that I think I should punish myself even more for being bad? Maybe. The real problem is an irrational state of mind.

I think for me, being a perfectionist is both my best friend and my worst enemy when it comes to weight loss.  It allows me to stay on track and drop weight quickly by following the plan to the letter.  It also kills my progress once I become human, and fall off the wagon. It is inevitable bound to happen. I throw all logic and science out the door. If I screw up once, my journey is no longer perfect. I am no longer perfect. I might as well throw everything out the window, all that hard work for nothing. It feels like I have to start all over.

I desperately need to realize that that is not the case! I need to lose my perfectionism and become a realist & the scientist that I am! I have come so far! Losing 20 lbs since January 1st. It is a big deal! I have done good! I need to be proud of what I have accomplished and not just focus on the imperfections. Recognizing this is very empowering! I am worth it! Why would I let a measly 1-2 lb setback from eating an entire box of Valentine chocolates, an entire Large Pan Pizza Hut pizza, and whatever other junk I may have consumed over the last 3 days make me quit? I don't know but it happens to me time after time.  I severely stuggle getting back onto the wagon.

Not this time.  I have diet bet. I am also very competitive. I don't have to be the best, but damn it, I have to win! I am going to brush off that dirt, get the mud off my face and outta my hair and do whatever I can to try to win my bet! If I don't, hey, that's alright, I will still be a winner. I did what I could, in the time I had and most importantly got back on track!

Will I fall off again, yep! It's part of life.  It's how I handle it that is important. Will I always have dietbet, nope! I will just have to take it as it comes and find my scientist/realist and get my head back into the game. I will cross that bridge when it gets here. Until then I can be proud of what I've accomplished and that I was able to get back up.