Afraid To Lose Weight

Awww, I'm sorry. I haven't been in your exact situation, but losing weight CAN bring up some pretty crazy thoughts & feelings. All I can offer is, be the best you that you can be. Be healthy for yourself & your kids.

In my opinion my husband is fine... I mean his pants are 36..the same as our teenage boys!! He's a vegetarian, used to run, but still works his butt off so it's not that he has stopped activity. I am way too afraid of hurting his feelings, by suggesting he do anything, cause I DO love him just the way he is.

I feel like he deserves to be with someone who he can't wait to see at the end of the day, who drives him crazy, who he 'wants' to be with....because he loves her, not because of her weight or her cute butt or whatever. It's really become an issue for me. I don't even like watching sexy scenes on tv when he's there, like it's the elephant in the room.

Before... we were hot and heavy and everyone knew it...so people still jab him in the ribs and wink at me and talk about how much fun the newlyweds must be having. Ugh.

The next question....he's VERY affectionate. Kisses me, holds my hand, tells me he loves me, snuggles in bed... but he's killing me & our marriage.

I'm pretty sure my diet and lack of exercise have effected my sex drive. Maybe it's the same for him. I agree that you should try to get him involved in your new healthy lifestyle!

I don't know what kind of shape your husband is in, but it sounds like you both need to do this together.

have you tried initiating and not taking his no for an answer? just saying. It doesn't have to come from him.

Idk. I feel like I'll just be so pissed! Rejecting me and hurting me and neglecting me... over weight? Pissed and newly skinny....bad combo.

So, you think you will be horrified to find out that your husband only likes you when you are thin? I hear you when you say that it is scary to find out that he doesn't love you for you. BUT, turn the scenario around. Maybe the weight is making you less energetic, sad, unmotivated, discouraged. What if you are, unknowingly, giving off "not tonight" signals. If you (or I) don't feel well how can we feel sexy. Lose the weight girl! Give him the chance to prove you wrong. You will feel better and your happiness will be an awesome turn-on.

My husband sounds a lot like yours but your fears are just the "insecure women" in us that is always trying to tell us we aren't good enough. Truly, the problem is probably him and not you. A man's sex drive slows down as he gets a little older and so many things can effect it. Diet and exercise plays a huge part and if he has stopped working out and eating right and isn't getting enough sleep, his sex drive will totally disappear. Pair that with stress and he will be damn near impotent!!! Try to motivate him to workout with you and keep only healthy food in the house and it should help to get him some more energy.